Friday, June 22, 2012

Every Day I'm Shufflin'

Since I've mostly lost the will to write, how 'bout if I just turn this blog into re-posts of random Star Wars comedy I find sprinkled throughout the internet?  How does that sound?  I know it wouldn't get old for me.

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Good Job, Good Effort

So our tailgate at the College World Series was awesome enough to make the newspaper....but somehow, that photographer found the absolute perfect angle to completely block me behind the Jumbo Jenga.  I still don't know how he did it, probably some trick in the Matrix or something.  If you look closely, you can barely make out my right leg behind the board (upon further review: no you can't, since this is a picture of the actual newspaper, and not the digital one online.  F word.)  At the moment of this picture, I was being especially heroic, sprinting up and leaping to deflect the falling Jenga pieces before they crushed Emily's skull (while being careful not to spill my BL Smoothie).  I feel like that would've made a much better picture, but whatever, maybe that's why I'm not a photographer for the Omaha Herald.  What a dick.

All in all, it was another superb year of tailgating-but-not-entering-the-stadium at the College World Series.  We hit up downtown Friday night, got a couple hours less sleep than I would've liked, were among the first 15 cars to arrive in Lot B in the morning, survived an early-morning monsoon for the second year in a row, met a lot of randoms and even made a few new Facebook friends out of the deal, drank for about 17 hours, crushed some Taco Bell, and even stayed awake to watch the Dream Team documentary (which was AWESOME) at 3am while battling the noise level from Gangel and Addy, who were put on a 'Dueling Banjos' type snoring-session.  Big ups to the Omaha crew again, they really know how to bring it.  Maybe next year we'll go inside the stadium.....???  

But probably not.  I'd rather sit outside and drink all day.  My off-days are my off-days.

Friday, June 15, 2012

Things I Think About During Songs. Volume 5.

I am obsessed with the play count on my itunes.  I'm constantly checking the top 25, top 50, top 100, etc.  I love looking at all the different statistics since I got my current computer six years ago.  Lord help you if you're riding in my car and you try to skip a song once it's already halfway done-- by that point it has 'earned' its play count, and needs to be played all the way through.  Just total OCD behavior.  I have a bunch of playlists that are songs grouped by a certain number of plays, then the playlist is titled by something relating to that number of plays.  (Examples: a playlist with a bunch of songs with 25 plays is titled "Bobby Bonillas"; a playlist with a bunch of songs with 13-16 plays is titled "Lizzie McGuires"; etc. etc.)

So I love finding little oddities in the play counts.  "Anna Sun" has only been on my itunes for about 16 months, but is already my 14th most played song.  'Fool in the Rain' is my favorite song of all time, but only my 22nd-most played.  I only know of about six songs by The Toadies total, couldn't name a single member of their band, don't know anything else about them....and two of their songs are in my top 5 most-played.  And so on.

However, I discovered this a couple of days ago, and it has to be the biggest upset in my itunes:  the MC Hammer song that has the highest play count is not "U Can't Touch This" and it's not "2 Legit 2 Quit", and it's not even one of the lesser known but still popular hits like "Here Comes The Hammer" or "The Addams Family Groove"'s "Do Not Pass Me By." 

That's really effing bizarre.

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

To Answer A Popular Question:

I had to disable comments for the time being because spammers have taken over the comments sections of blog posts from years ago, and I get an email every time a comment comes in.  So I was getting like 30-40 emails a day that were either A) gibberish computer code; 2) links or advertisements for boner medicine; or D) something that looked like Easy E typed it at 4am after 19 Morgan OJ's (I knew it wasn't him, though, since he didn't finish the comment by saying 'weak sauce'.)  So I'll see if sitting the next couple of plays out makes the spammers go away, then we'll try enabling comments again.  Or as Lane summed it up:  "So you're punishing everybody because you're too lazy to read a few emails every day.  Real cool."  Well put.  And very true.


Random thoughts, so I at least kill more than just 30 seconds of your work day today:

>>  The Avengers was a pretty kick-ass movie, even though the only character's movie I had seen prior was Iron Man.  Still pretty awesome.  However, the best random part was at the very end of the movie, in the obligatory "let's show a quick clip of the news to tell the audience how the public is reacting to the aftermath of the battle between superheros and other-worldy monsters that completely obliterated Manhattan" scene.  And who was the government figure giving his monologue?  Mr. James Eckhouse, aka Jim Walsh from Beverly Hills, 90210.  Teens and I nearly jumped out of our seats and yelled at each other in unison: "Jimbo Walsh!!!" which I'm sure went over well with the other moviegoers.  I'm sure you had to be there, but it was awesome.  So now I've seen Jimbo Walsh in exactly four things in my life: in a 15-second speaking role in The Avengers, as a background guy on vacation when Tom Cruise is bartending in Jamaica in Cocktail, as Eddie Murphy's jail cell guard in Trading Places....and as one of the greatest TV dads in history in 90210.  What a career.  What a guy.  Jimbo Fucking Walsh.

Here's Jimbo giving Tom Cruise his best "Yo, Jerry Maguire, I could use a fresh marg down here, I'm about to close on this broad in the two-piece, but I need a couple more to seal the deal, so let's keep them fucking coming, Top Gun" look.  Basically putting on an acting clinic, like usual.  Some people don't need to have lines to impact a movie.

>>  During Game 5 the other night, I took the next step in my Oklahoma City Thunder bandwagon jumping, a process that has been ongoing since 2008:  while watching the game in a bar, I was jumping out of my chair and yelling at the refs/pumping my fists/cursing Manu Ginobili and Tony Parker's flop show/putting up the three goggles after big three pointers/making a scene in general.  I can officially say that James Harden is my favorite non-Jayhawk basketball player ever, and that I love OKC more than any other NBA team since the '99 New York Knicks.  Big steps for me.

>>  Who feels older:  Adam Sandler, for starring in a movie in which he plays Andy Samberg's dad?  Or me, for being in 5th grade when Sandler's comedy CDs were the funniest thing around?  Seems like just yesterday that we had to listen in my bedroom with the volume turned way down so my parents didn't hear Sandler scream things like "Owwww, fuck me in the goat ass!" or "Pretend I'm the pizza delivery guy and watch me whack off" as we rolled on the floor in laughing hysterics.  It's a toss-up, really.

Friday, June 1, 2012

Once Again, I'm An Idiot

You can file this under "I'm a Star Wars nerd" or "I constantly have awkward interactions with my co-workers", whichever you feel like.

Co-worker (who is a woman in her late 40's, just to clarify): Oh! Jum, I forgot to tell you, last Sunday I watched Star Wars!

Me, instantly excited and 100% engaged in the conversation: All six of them? NICE! I've been meaning to have a day like that, it's been too long since I've had a Star Wars day.  Damn I miss those, we used to have them in college all the time.

Co-worker, confused and slightly taken aback: Well, no...not all six. What?  I just watched like half an hour of the first one, I thought of you.  Wait, what?  All six in one day?

Me: Oh!....oh. Well yeah, I guess that makes more sense.  Let's change the subject and pretend I didn't just say that.

Co-worker:  Gladly.