Game 4 was being played that evening, and the Sox were up 3-0 in the series, so we knew there was a chance that our free tickets to Game 5 would be worth nothing more than the story you're hearing now. I was roughly 70% cheering against the Red Sox that night. Yeah, I wanted to go to a game in person, and yeah, I'd LOVE to see them clinch the World Series in person....but there was 30% of me that wanted them to just wrap it up and win it now. I mean, we just watched the Sox come back from 3-0 down against the Yankees less than a week ago. Let's not tempt fate here.
The drive was mostly uneventful. There were lots of moments where I couldn't suppress my gut reaction before realizing that what just happened actually hurt our chances for seeing a game. Johnny Damon leads off the game with a homer: "YEAHHHHH!!! Wait, FUCK!" Repeat, repeat, repeat. Also, Dunph ran over a cat on the interstate (you could actually feel the skull crunch against the bumper) and after about 30 seconds of horrified silence, he looked over at me and said "Welp, some little kid's best friend isn't coming home tonight!", I named the cat Crunch, and we laughed for about 45 miles.
We made it as far as Sioux City, Iowa, before we decided to pull in and find somewhere to watch the remainder of the game. Boston was up three runs in the 7th, and was solidly in control. I needed to at least watch the clinch on TV, I couldn't deal with having just the radio for such a moment. What is this, 1938? Is this one of FDR's Fireside Chats? No way. We're pulling over and watching somewhere.
We chose the Argosy Riverboat Casino, right off the interstate. We watched the end of the game, I had some of the best-tasting and most rewarding beers of my life, and then we looked at each other and said "What next?"
What's next ended up being:
- Getting an extended tutorial from the dealers on how to play craps (the casino was mostly empty that night, and they were just happy for something to do);
- Cautiously putting a few bucks on the table and dipping our toes in the water;
- Winning everything in sight and going up a few hundred each in a matter of 20 minutes-- celebrating, boozing, shit-talking, and high-fiving like we owned the place;
- Watching a dude who looked exactly like JR Ewing from Dallas stroll up to the table and casually buy in for $50K in chips;
- Slowly having our excitement eroded away, since it's tough to celebrate a $40 win when Yosemite Sam next to you just lost 8 grand;
- Eventually losing all the money we were up for the night, plus all the money we brought with us for the trip, plus all the money from our respective ATM withdrawals.
All in all, an awesome night, and also the reason that every time I drive through Sioux City on my way back to North Dakota and pass the Argosy, I re-enact the anguished arm extension of Lloyd Christmas reaching for Mary Swanson.
For the last few days, I've been going back and forth on whether or not I want to make an impromptu road trip and try and catch Game 4 in person. On one hand, it's not a 13-hour drive to St. Louis anymore. BroMo (BROther of a different MOther) lives there, so I have a place to stay. On the other hand, ticket prices are outrageous. Also, I haven't exactly been a model employee the last month or so, what with trips to Minnesota, Montana, and a golf outing for a wedding-- not to mention multiple trips to the dentist (FYI dudes, periotherapy sucks.)
After some hemming and hawing, the memory of this story from 2004 is what finally swayed me. Even though I don't have free tickets this time, and even though the absolute shittiest tickets in the ballpark still cost enough to pay for a night at the craps table at the Argosy in Sioux City....I mean, what was I gonna do, NOT go?
In the end, it kept coming back to one sentence ringing over and over in my head. A sentence that 90% of the time, I'm on the other side of, using it to get people to do things when they're straddling the fence:
Old Jum would do it.
Oh, and in the event of a Red Sox loss, if anyone knows of any good bridges to sleep on in the greater St. Louis area, please let me know. I know there's obviously a bunch of highways crossing the Mississippi River, but I'd prefer to keep it smaller. Pedestrian bridges are more my steez. I know, I know, beggars can't be choosers, but please keep it in mind when making your recommendations. Thank you.
