One quick sidenote, before we dive right into the Charter: I don't know why both Danny and I forgot this amazing fact until last week, but when we did our mock draft during the car ride to Kansas in April (interestingly, the exact same thing Simmons and Ford did yesterday, only we did the whole first round) we did a mock lottery as well. Our top three picks: Portland, Seattle, Atlanta. Weeeeeird.
The Culligan Manor Charter (after a few amendments)
1. Roommates don't lie to other roommates.
2. Roommates respect other roommates.
3. Roommates don't keep secrets from other roommates. Chicks do that.
4. Respect the apartment. It is, after all, an extension of Mike Noland.
5. No shoes on Horp's bed. Apparently, Horp, however, is allowed to pee his bed.
6. All visitors of the opposite sex must have an escort after 9 p.m.
7. Visitors of the opposite sex determined to be "randoms" are not to be treated with the same level of respect as girlfriends of roomates. They must earn that respect.
8. All visitors that are picking up food on the way over must ask the current tenants if they want anything from that establishment.
9. Safety. Stroller. 'Nuff said.
10. There can be no resisting a proper "Katoosh." If the "Katoosh" is improperly demonstrated, the offending party receives one punch.
11. There is no "stirring the pot" from a third party once the involved participants have sufficiently ended the argument. The offending third party receives one punch from each of the aforementioned participants.
12. Only 4 text messages allowed in one sitting. After any combination of 4, you must do one lap around the apartment before you are allowed to send or read another texty. *This does not apply to Big D, who has not yet entered the exciting world of text messaging.*
13. When participating in any competitive arena; be it Madden, Star Wars Monopoly, Cribbage, Tiger Woods, Clue, etc. remember that the two characteristics vital to a gentlemanly contest are mental toughness and integrity.
