I will most likely not be participating in Halloween shenanigans tonight. I'd be down like Charlie Brown if there were some good house parties going on, but I can't stand going to bars dressed up in a Halloween costume. It's one thing to try and sniff random girls' hair at the bar on any random night (I've found Tuesdays are best) but when you do it on Halloween, when the girl turns to yell at you and/or slap you across the face, suddenly you become a lot more aware that she's dressed as Raggedy Ann (a slutty Raggedy Ann, of course) and you're in a full Jedi costume. Just a lot more awkwardness involved.
But if I was going out, though- I'm pretty sure my costume would be the legendary Tommy Seebach, he of The Tommy Seebach Band fame. Even though nobody would know who he is and I'd have to explain myself a million times (another one of the things I hate about Halloween: "Who are you supposed to be? Ohhhh that's hilarious/cute/creative/original/slutty!!!." Blah blah blah. Can we just get drunk?) it would be worth it, because of how awesome he is:
And if it was still the Culligan days, can't you just see Paul dressed up as the drummer in the background on the left? I feel like he could totally pull that off, as long as I gave him 18 months' advance notice to grow that moustache.
I'm sure I've linked to this a million times; since, you know, it's the greatest music video of all time (if you can even call it a 'video').....but once more couldn't hurt. I'm pretty sure that there's something in my DNA that makes me susceptible to the beat in Apache, and I've been subconsciously brianwashed. Between this version, the commonly-known Sugarhill Gang version, the Sir-Mix-A-Lot version, and the other instrumental versions I've downloaded (including one that sounds like it's being played by a bunch of Native Americans sitting around a campfire) I'm up to like six different types of Apache in my iPod, and I still can't get enough of it. Best song in human history.
This is neither here nor there, but a girl told me the other day that I should totally dress up as Terry from Reno 911 for Halloween. She meant it as a compliment, that I do a good Nick Swardson impression, but still...I don't think there's any way that being told you could easily pull off a homosexual prostitute who exclusively wears roller skates and nut-huggers can ever be called a good thing. But I'll take it.
Everyone have a happy Halloween. Guys, take advantage of the evening. Ladies.....keep, uhhh....keep doin' what you're doin.