Monday, June 22, 2009

Sports Sports Sports

>> Back in 2007, I was pumping my fist and shouting in joy when I found out that Dice-K would be pitching at the game we were attending during our Boston trip that summer. Now, not even two years later, I was pumping my fist and shouting in joy when I saw the headline "Dice-K headed to DL with arm fatigue." That about sums up how bad Dice-K has sucked so far this year.

>> This coming Thursday is one of my favorite days of the year: the NBA Draft. If the Knicks or another team I like ends up drafting Tyler Hansbrough...let's just say it will NOT be one of my favorite days. It's gonna happen too; I probably deserve it.

>> Another runner-up finish in the U.S. Open for my boy Phil Mickelson. Another back nine filled with missed short putts and disappointment. Our golf games are so similar it's stupid (obviously I mean that on a much, much, much, much smaller scale- I'm not insinuating that I'm anywhere near his level. Sorry to point out the obvious, but with friends like mine, that clarification becomes necessary.) We are both erratic off the tee, have pretty solid irons, can work a little magic around the green, and LOVE to miss short putts, usually multiple times over the course of a single round. Despite Phil being my favorite golfer, in no way am I trying to emulate his style. It's an extremely frustrating way to play the game of golf.

>> I would've felt sorry for Ricky Barnes after he blew that gigantic lead...except for the fact that he always looks like he came to the 1st tee straight from the beer pong table in the Kappa Sig basement. Ipso facto, I don't feel bad for him. He can take his $600,000 second-place check and just go nuts at Abercrombie next weekend.


To steal a line from Chris Rock: Take off that silly-ass hat.



>> Speaking of golf attire, the comment section last time kind of turned into a 'I hate when people wear ____ on the golf course' so I thought I would expound on that:

I dislike it when people wear the following things on a golf course:

- Backward hats
- Backward/upside down/anything but straight visors (visors are acceptable on the golf course, but that is the only place- unless you're wearing one of those green poker dealer visors, those can be funny in the right setting...like when you're dealing poker)
- Sleeveless shirts
- Basketball shorts
- T-shirts and flip-flops (we call that the Fundy Special)

HOWEVER, I wouldn't necessarily call someone a douche for wearing that stuff. I realize that some people aren't a golf snob like me, and they're just out to have a good time, drink some beers, maybe they're on a bachelor party, whatever the case may be. I agree with the old cliche "dress well, play well" but I realize that not everyone shares that opinion when it comes to golf.

I mean, when I see the fat dude wearing jean shorts, sandals and an REO Speedwagon shirt that the Sleeve Monster got a hold of, and he's hitting his 7th shot on a par 4 and he's still 120 yards out, and I mutter under my breath "trailer trash cluttering up the course"....I'm sure he's looking right back at me with my pastel-colored polo, khakis and matching Titleist hat and muttering "goddamm homosexuals gayin' up the course" as he cracks open another warm beer that he smuggled in his golf bag so he didn't have to pay the beer cart girl 4 dollars. So that's cool.

So I wouldn't put those people in the douche category. Except for the backward/upside down visor- then you're a douche for sure. But those guys probably already know that.