1. I am a Tar Heel for life!
2. I know my mom is hot, so quit telling me.
3. No, I've never seen my mom naked. I mean, probably when I was a baby, but I don't remember it. Quit asking me that, too.
4. I like Quizno more than Subway. Subway sucks, they put way too much mayo on my sandwiches. It's like they don't even know what "just a little mayo" means, WTF?!?
5. I've never kissed a girl before. Everytime I get one of those urges, I just go to the gym and shoot 1,000 free throws. I don't shoot 80% for nothing, bro!
6. I've seen Britney Spears in concert 7 times. She is totally underappreciated as an artist.
7. I've never looked at one of those Magic Eye pictures and NOT been able to see the hidden image. Those things are easy.
8. Also, when I was in elementary school, the first time I ever looked at a Where's Waldo? book, I beat the whole thing in 7 minutes. I swear I did, my friends timed me. The Land of Waldos at the end wasn't even hard. He's the one missing a shoe....duh.
9. I can do 17 pull-ups in a row, without stopping once. I could probably do more, but I don't want to try. I'm saving it for the scouts.
10. One year, I asked my parents, once a day, for a horse that Christmas. I didn't really want one, but I knew they were crazy expensive and my parents would say no, so then when my parents "only" bought me a new bike, a Nintendo, my own phone, a remote-control airplane, a tree house, golf clubs, and a bunch of other stuff, it made it seem like they weren't spending a lot on me. Best Christmas ever.
11. I walked out of There Will Be Blood after 10 minutes. I thought that movie was supposed to be good....there wasn't even any talking yet! UMM, hello, boring much? I demanded my money back from the guy behind the counter, then used it to buy $8.25 worth of gobstoppers. Totally worth it.
12. I don't like crossword puzzles, they're for losers. What's an 8-letter word for the Greek hero of war? I don't know, why don't you tell me, nerd? What a waste of time.
13. I had really bad acne when I was younger, and I got made fun of a lot. It finally cleared up, and now I totally rip on other kids who have pimples. I mean, I had to go through it, so why should they get a free pass? It all evens out.
14. The first thing I ever bought with my allowance was a Boyz II Men CD. It's still probably my favorite CD ever.
15. I'm really scared of heights. I still plan on going skydiving someday. I'll just close my eyes when I jump.
16. Say what you will about the others, but in my opinon, Sporty Spice was the hottest of all the Spice Girls. Easily.
17. One time, on a dare, I went up to a group of girls and asked "Can someone do me a favor and call a veteranarian?" When they asked why, I flexed my arms and said, "Cause these phythons are siiiiick!" They all started laughing, and one girl seemed totally interested, and I was gonna ask her on a date, but we had a road game that weekend, so it probably wouldn't have worked out anyway.
18. I know all the lyrics to "Jump Around" by House of Pain, and I don't usually like to brag, but I'm really good at rapping them. Sometimes I tilt my hat sideways and rap for the guys, and they all think it's hilarious. Especially the black guys, one time I caught them all recording me on their cell phones. They must have REALLY liked it!
19. One time I stole money from a homeless guy. He had passed out on the sidewalk, and he just left his little change cup sitting there! Maybe if he took better care of his money he wouldn't be homeless.
20. My favorite cereal is Lucky Charms. Most people just pick out the marshamallows and eat those, but I do the opposite. I pick out the marshmallows and throw them all away. They're not very good for you, and scouts like when you have a healthy diet. I checked.
21. I hunted for Easter eggs until I was 19. Why should all the little kids have all the fun?
22. I think Will Smith is the greatest actor in the world, and nobody can tell me differently. Have you SEEN I, Robot?
23. When I was little, I got mad cause I couldn't beat the next-to-last level of Super Mario on my GameBoy, so I threw it against the wall and it broke. I told my parents that it just stopped working, and we were able to exchange it at the store for a new one. Hahahaha suckers!
24. I hate the word 'mystery.' Why can't it just be spelled 'mistery'? It makes way more sense, and my third grade spelling bee would've turned out A LOT differently, I can tell you that much.
25. If my career in the NBA doesn't work out (as if!) I'll probably just become a writer. I got an B+ on my last Comp 101 paper, and I didn't even try that hard on it. It was a 5-pager, and I didn't even start until the day before it was due. My roommate says I might be a natural.
2. I know my mom is hot, so quit telling me.
3. No, I've never seen my mom naked. I mean, probably when I was a baby, but I don't remember it. Quit asking me that, too.
4. I like Quizno more than Subway. Subway sucks, they put way too much mayo on my sandwiches. It's like they don't even know what "just a little mayo" means, WTF?!?
5. I've never kissed a girl before. Everytime I get one of those urges, I just go to the gym and shoot 1,000 free throws. I don't shoot 80% for nothing, bro!
6. I've seen Britney Spears in concert 7 times. She is totally underappreciated as an artist.
7. I've never looked at one of those Magic Eye pictures and NOT been able to see the hidden image. Those things are easy.
8. Also, when I was in elementary school, the first time I ever looked at a Where's Waldo? book, I beat the whole thing in 7 minutes. I swear I did, my friends timed me. The Land of Waldos at the end wasn't even hard. He's the one missing a shoe....duh.
9. I can do 17 pull-ups in a row, without stopping once. I could probably do more, but I don't want to try. I'm saving it for the scouts.
10. One year, I asked my parents, once a day, for a horse that Christmas. I didn't really want one, but I knew they were crazy expensive and my parents would say no, so then when my parents "only" bought me a new bike, a Nintendo, my own phone, a remote-control airplane, a tree house, golf clubs, and a bunch of other stuff, it made it seem like they weren't spending a lot on me. Best Christmas ever.
11. I walked out of There Will Be Blood after 10 minutes. I thought that movie was supposed to be good....there wasn't even any talking yet! UMM, hello, boring much? I demanded my money back from the guy behind the counter, then used it to buy $8.25 worth of gobstoppers. Totally worth it.
12. I don't like crossword puzzles, they're for losers. What's an 8-letter word for the Greek hero of war? I don't know, why don't you tell me, nerd? What a waste of time.
13. I had really bad acne when I was younger, and I got made fun of a lot. It finally cleared up, and now I totally rip on other kids who have pimples. I mean, I had to go through it, so why should they get a free pass? It all evens out.
14. The first thing I ever bought with my allowance was a Boyz II Men CD. It's still probably my favorite CD ever.
15. I'm really scared of heights. I still plan on going skydiving someday. I'll just close my eyes when I jump.
16. Say what you will about the others, but in my opinon, Sporty Spice was the hottest of all the Spice Girls. Easily.
17. One time, on a dare, I went up to a group of girls and asked "Can someone do me a favor and call a veteranarian?" When they asked why, I flexed my arms and said, "Cause these phythons are siiiiick!" They all started laughing, and one girl seemed totally interested, and I was gonna ask her on a date, but we had a road game that weekend, so it probably wouldn't have worked out anyway.
18. I know all the lyrics to "Jump Around" by House of Pain, and I don't usually like to brag, but I'm really good at rapping them. Sometimes I tilt my hat sideways and rap for the guys, and they all think it's hilarious. Especially the black guys, one time I caught them all recording me on their cell phones. They must have REALLY liked it!
19. One time I stole money from a homeless guy. He had passed out on the sidewalk, and he just left his little change cup sitting there! Maybe if he took better care of his money he wouldn't be homeless.
20. My favorite cereal is Lucky Charms. Most people just pick out the marshamallows and eat those, but I do the opposite. I pick out the marshmallows and throw them all away. They're not very good for you, and scouts like when you have a healthy diet. I checked.
21. I hunted for Easter eggs until I was 19. Why should all the little kids have all the fun?
22. I think Will Smith is the greatest actor in the world, and nobody can tell me differently. Have you SEEN I, Robot?
23. When I was little, I got mad cause I couldn't beat the next-to-last level of Super Mario on my GameBoy, so I threw it against the wall and it broke. I told my parents that it just stopped working, and we were able to exchange it at the store for a new one. Hahahaha suckers!
24. I hate the word 'mystery.' Why can't it just be spelled 'mistery'? It makes way more sense, and my third grade spelling bee would've turned out A LOT differently, I can tell you that much.
25. If my career in the NBA doesn't work out (as if!) I'll probably just become a writer. I got an B+ on my last Comp 101 paper, and I didn't even try that hard on it. It was a 5-pager, and I didn't even start until the day before it was due. My roommate says I might be a natural.
